subreddit:

/r/blackmagicfuckery

32.4k

dude compressed himself like a winrar

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[deleted]

all 387 comments

AlluriousVOLmoleCule

1.4k points

3 months ago

He didn’t even need to do all that shoulder fuckery, but you know. 📸

HalcyonEnder

239 points

3 months ago

She he stands next to it you can see his waist is smaller in diameter, just wanted to show off the shoulder flair

implicate

98 points

3 months ago

Cool of you to use she he's preferred pronouns.

YobaiYamete

58 points

3 months ago

He also didn't need to do it in the middle of the walkway in a busy mall. But y'know, attention

11711510111411009710

36 points

3 months ago

I mean, it's pretty cool, I think those people watching actually were interested in it. It breaks up the day, and it's something you probably never see irl.

wwerdo4

22 points

3 months ago

wwerdo4

22 points

3 months ago

The mall isn’t the place to be if your in a hurry for pretty much anything

OGMcSwaggerdick

2 points

3 months ago

Oh cool, but what the fuck is up with those shoes?

washyleopard

-5 points

3 months ago

washyleopard

-5 points

3 months ago

He's using his arm as a lever to push the racket down his chest past the tightest spot.

___PDLIF

34 points

3 months ago

No he’s not lol. Could easily achieve the same result by just standing up and pushing down.

northboundcentreriot

9 points

3 months ago

Facts. I used to do this when I was a teenager, and doing it with a coat hanger

SpooktorB

6 points

3 months ago

Firefighters do the same for training, for for rings on a ladder. I don't know if the racket is smaller or bigger though considering

northboundcentreriot

3 points

3 months ago

I'd say it's bigger, but I'm not a ladder or racquet inspector

SpooktorB

6 points

3 months ago

[I know how to solve this.]

Are you stupid? Obviously the racket is bigger because of its circular shape!

[There, now some ladder and racquet inspectors should be coming in to correct me]

NotADabberTho

2 points

3 months ago

I assume you mean a metal coat hanger, but that can bend around you.

northboundcentreriot

1 points

3 months ago

You would be wrong. A plastic one that would break once it reaches a certain point in bending.

NotADabberTho

1 points

3 months ago

It still bends a little, that's all that matters. What he went through doesn't bend, like at all.

Theoceancookie

0 points

3 months ago

thats what she said

UmChill

1 points

3 months ago

huh?

GGGirls-Unit

-2 points

3 months ago

GGGirls-Unit

-2 points

3 months ago

I don't think his shoulders would have fit through the racket if he didn't dislocate one. The rest of the body is easy.

saltire429

2 points

3 months ago

His shoulders were both already through.

Stinkydew

1 points

3 months ago

I think he did that to get his shoulder back in place, maybe?

Interkitten

2.7k points

3 months ago

Luckily there was no sound, there’d be a racquet otherwise.

[deleted]

319 points

3 months ago

[deleted]

319 points

3 months ago

Get out!

Joshudan

130 points

3 months ago

Joshudan

130 points

3 months ago

I think his joke just touched the line

assidreemz

10 points

3 months ago

“Mark it zero, Dude.”

appdevil

5 points

3 months ago

*love

insomniacakess

59 points

3 months ago

get out

Mychael612

59 points

3 months ago

You may not have loved it, but this joke was ace

5141121

60 points

3 months ago

5141121

60 points

3 months ago

It definitely served it's purpose

appdevil

25 points

3 months ago

I Love that.

5141121

15 points

3 months ago

5141121

15 points

3 months ago

I'm happy you were unable to find fault with my comment

VibraniumRhino

14 points

3 months ago

And yet we’d all be happy to take you to court over it.

AtOneWithTheLunatics

8 points

3 months ago

And net a pretty penny

crap_university

6 points

3 months ago

First the fire fighters, now this. What's next?

droo46

4 points

3 months ago

droo46

4 points

3 months ago

Son, I’m gonna have you to step out of the vehicle. r/Punpatrol

Andreus

5 points

3 months ago

Take your upvote and get out

eraserewrite

11 points

3 months ago

I love what you did there.

Yeejiurn

2 points

3 months ago

At the time of my comment there was 2.2k dads upvoting this comment

Derfargin

2 points

3 months ago

The dude just got served!!!

ArkBlitz7

5 points

3 months ago

goug

1 points

3 months ago

goug

1 points

3 months ago

Tenez, voici votre award

Darkpriest2288

-3 points

3 months ago

ShellaStorm

394 points

3 months ago

Go go Marfan syndrome. Connective tissue disorders make you hypermobile.

ProcyonLotorMinoris

299 points

3 months ago

Pros of hypermobile disorders: We can fit anywhere and do party tricks.

Cons of hypermobile disorders: Everything is pain and everything dislocates.

ShellaStorm

104 points

3 months ago

After about thirty, I couldn't fit through anything any more but everything still dislocates.

texasproof

26 points

3 months ago

THIS. All my party tricks are significantly less entertaining now that I’m 30lb heavier and in constant pain.

supagirl277

4 points

3 months ago

It’s why I don’t purposely do party tricks. Just because I can, doesn’t mean I should. My left leg already feels like a slinky from accidentally dislocating it 3 times

LostFun4

24 points

3 months ago

I love when my shoulder dislocates while swimming.

datagirl60

16 points

3 months ago

Or getting bumped in the hallway.

Herbie53101

11 points

3 months ago

Or literally just leaning against something for 5 seconds at a slightly wrong angle.

Staccato-system

4 points

3 months ago

Had to go to hospital today cus my shoulder subluxed every time I relaxed my shoulder or moved it forward in any way. 100+ subluxations by the time I got to A&E from the time I started counting (bout 4 hours). It fuckin sucks man :/

Herbie53101

4 points

3 months ago

Oh, that’s awful. That’s kind of how my one hip is, like it just doesn’t stay in its correct spot for more than like 2 minutes anymore. How are you doing by the way?

Staccato-system

6 points

3 months ago

Found one position with a sling that works, so I'm letting it rest up for a few days, then back to physio exercises, apparently for that shoulder, the muscle itself is pushing the joint out of the socket to move it so by doing specific physio exercises my shoulder should relearn how to move correctly. Thankfully for the meantime, painkillers exist, and I could get on with most of my day, even attending my 9am statistics class! Sadly, painkillers can't numb the pain of 9am statistics class though... how about you?

Herbie53101

3 points

3 months ago

Good luck with all of that, I hope things get better. Personally I’m doing okay, my joints have been screwed up my whole life, so I’m kind of used to it at this point. I do strengthening exercises and all that, but there’s really not much to be done to fix something caused by a physical disorder, so it is what it is.

supagirl277

2 points

3 months ago

Or when you’re setting down something heavy

Herbie53101

2 points

3 months ago

All I have to say is: shotput bucket.

colorfulzeeb

23 points

3 months ago

This is exactly the kind of shit my geneticist told me to stop doing when I got my hEDS diagnosis. I just wish my shoulders didn’t continue to shift like that on their own from rolling over in bed.

ipodplayer777

19 points

3 months ago

I have a CTD. Everything is stretchy. 28 hour bladder holds, high lung capacity, incredible flexibility, immune to ankle rolls, etc. I’ve been told that impacts are less likely to break bones or tear ligaments. It’s fucking great

Run_Fluid

3 points

3 months ago

luffy

SlapTheBap

2 points

3 months ago

Heads up my dude, it's all fun until you're older. Stay active and keep up strength. Every dislocation, every rolled ankle, is causing more damage than you realize. It's very easy to end up with muscles that are unbalanced if you're active. These unbalanced muscles can result in bad posture, which will cause further subluxations and even dislocations.

fangeld

13 points

3 months ago

fangeld

13 points

3 months ago

Looks more like Ehler Danlos. He's not that tall and his hands aren't very large either

Lumpy_Machine5538

3 points

3 months ago

I was thinking Ehlers Danlos.

fistofthefuture

123 points

3 months ago

“Can you please move I’m trying to get to Cinnabon.”

sincethenes

47 points

3 months ago

Shesnotintothistrack

7 points

3 months ago

Oh great. That sub makes me want to leave society. What a bunch of selfish entitled pricks

PlsLeavemealone02

39 points

3 months ago

"Autobots, roll out."

"You forgot me!"

"Oh. And the human Tyler too."

MyNameIsIgglePiggle

148 points

3 months ago

Poor bastard didn't get paid for his efforts just like WinRAR too

bankrobba

17 points

3 months ago

A couple days ago on /r/nextfuckinglevel, a fireman laid on the ground and slowly slipped through a ladder square that was noticeably bigger. This is actual next fucking level.

Ethayy

8 points

3 months ago

Ethayy

8 points

3 months ago

Saw that shit, this is definitely more impressive

Eatchaboody31

48 points

3 months ago

No bones Jones

Anthrac1t3

85 points

3 months ago

Ok I'll be that guy. WinRAR is the archiving program for windows. .rar is the file type. The title is incorrect in the same way you wouldn't say "I wrote a Microsoft Word". Gib down votes pls

C4bl3Fl4m3

20 points

3 months ago

Thank you for being that guy so I didn't have to. Sorry, only upvotes to give.

AussieOsborne

8 points

3 months ago

WinRAR can compress itself tho

angrytroll123

3 points

3 months ago

That's a fair point but that would quite literally be the most ambiguous reference you can make with the winrar reference. Why would anyone be compressing winrar the application enough that it would be used as a reference unless for some reason, winrar compress at a much better ratio than other files?

angrytroll123

3 points

3 months ago

I am also that guy and posted the same thing.

SqueakyFart85

161 points

3 months ago

Caption ftw!

Ragdoll_Psychics

18 points

3 months ago

Yeah, nearly. He compressed himself like winRAR (would compress a file into a RAR file). "compressed himself like WinRAR" works, but not "like a winRAR"

Sethy152

8 points

3 months ago

Pls use 7zip instead (in case you don’t already know of it). Faster, free, open source, and more reliable in general.

skratakh

11 points

3 months ago

i'm getting xfiles victor tooms vibes from this

SnooDoubts9969

4 points

3 months ago

His next return was meant to be 2023....

Loreto86

8 points

3 months ago

yay exo-L!!

Clumsyhandsandlegs

3 points

3 months ago

Me scrolling through the comments to find an 🥚😁

geven87

7 points

3 months ago

Jesus: It is easier to go through the eye of a needle--

This guy: Hold my beer.

AnomalouslyPolitical

2 points

3 months ago

"World's richest man builds world's largest needle"

Simen-VH

8 points

3 months ago

My man turned into a .zip file

curiousscribbler

6 points

3 months ago

Do it for Chanyeol

orchestragravy

6 points

3 months ago

Did he pay for the license though?

West-Wash6081

6 points

3 months ago

I saw an inmate do this once at a prison in south florida. He was in his cell in confinement and came out through the bean hole in the door where we insert the food trays at meal time. We had to modify his cell so that he couldn't do it again.

bambooshakedown

13 points

3 months ago

Very impressive! Still not paying, though…

LiberContrarion

18 points

3 months ago*

You have a fundamental misunderstanding as to how data compression works.

The result of running WinRAR on a human being would perhaps look either like a abomination of a humanoid form with only one eye, one fingernail, one hair, etc...or, more likely, a puddle of primordial ooze.

Either way, it would absolutely include an index referencing how to put him back together.

toss_me_good

2 points

3 months ago

yup, almost no one understands how anything in tech actually works. Frankly I'm more surprised OP even referenced WinRaR vs 7zip or something else. My guess is they are from India where WinRar for some unknown reason is still relevant.

P.S. for those wondering zip compression basically takes data that is similar and removes it providing a reference on how to put it back together. For example if you have a word document with the letter i in there a thousand times. it'll just reference where that i is suppose to go a thousand times but only keep it once. That's why database files and documents can be shrink down like crazy but Video files can not. Video Compression tools do something similar but in a much different way.

Stone0777

3 points

3 months ago

No one asked you, NERD…(jk)

LiberContrarion

1 points

3 months ago

In all honesty, I wrote that comment for myself and the one other person who would snort laugh.

Are you my one other person?

Stone0777

2 points

3 months ago

Yes…Got a chuckle out of me.

FilmmakerIan

3 points

3 months ago

Reminds me of the Pearl Street Contortionist

Sof04

3 points

3 months ago

Sof04

3 points

3 months ago

Coincidentally, I just saw a fireman do the same stunt, but through a stepladder hole.

OneTiredBicycle

3 points

3 months ago

Why is bro doing it in the middle of a busy mall

angrytroll123

11 points

3 months ago

That title makes no sense. You mean like a rar file. Winrar is an application.

Eatchaboody31

0 points

3 months ago

It is mainly used to unzip .zip files, which are compressed 🤷

angrytroll123

2 points

3 months ago

Winrar is actually used to compress/decompress many different formats. It's not unique as there is also winzip, 7zip and other programs that do the same.

Anyway, if you really want the "dude" to be the object of the compression you would say

"dude compressed himself like a rar file" or zip file or whatever.

If you want the dude to be the one doing the compression you would say

"dude compressed himself like winrar" notice there is no "a".

jjcoolel

2 points

3 months ago

Saw The Armenian Rubber Boy do that as part of the Jim Rose Circus Sideshow. “He was not born like you or I”

GrimmRadiance

2 points

3 months ago

Reminds me of The Forest.

diHin

2 points

3 months ago

diHin

2 points

3 months ago

Good for manual scavenging

albiceleste3stars

2 points

3 months ago

anti child bearing hips

Agomottos_eye

2 points

3 months ago

Garuda Mall, Bangalore?

HeartShapedSea

2 points

3 months ago

I broke my leg just trying to imagine doing this.

Wheel_N_Deal_Spheal

2 points

3 months ago

Alright, I'll say it for the rest of us...

Ouch.

Bornagain4karma

2 points

3 months ago

This is that Fireman's drill we saw a few days ago.

Equal_Caterpillar828

2 points

3 months ago

Wasn't this an X-Files episode?

bewatermyfriendx

5 points

3 months ago

that's not Winrar. That's 7zip wtf as if Winrar would be capable of something like that.

momof3boysandateen

2 points

3 months ago

The Matrix glitched

1mJustALurk3r

1 points

3 months ago

Pish. Do it with the strings on the racket. Then I'll be impressed.

trexwalters

1 points

3 months ago

Someone get this man spelunking!

5050logic

1 points

3 months ago

Not impressed. My cat does this all the time.

SaltedMozzarella

1 points

3 months ago

What a bunch of sheep

Zero_fg_5575

0 points

3 months ago

Dude is like a octopus fitting into a hole the size of a dime

Badpunsonlock

1 points

3 months ago

An octopus can fit through a hole that's roughly 1mm larger than it's beak or eyes.

Zero_fg_5575

1 points

3 months ago

😳 wow

tim125

-5 points

3 months ago

tim125

-5 points

3 months ago

Have my upvote.

davieb22

-2 points

3 months ago

davieb22

-2 points

3 months ago

And my axe!

lithuanianD

-5 points

3 months ago

And my shield!

man-in-blacks

-1 points

3 months ago

Holly shit

nerdboy5567

1 points

3 months ago

Using winrar like people still know what it is.

splurb

1 points

3 months ago

splurb

1 points

3 months ago

He didn't even take his hat off. I can't even think of a piece of sporting equipment I could fit through.

Canadian_in_Canada

1 points

3 months ago

Micro tears. So many micro tears. I hope he'll be OK.

Edistobound

1 points

3 months ago

Look ! A walking zip file !

syafizzaq

1 points

3 months ago

Bryan Cranston did the same thing in Madagascar,only a smaller ring.

psychoacer

1 points

3 months ago

Considering how long it took him to accomplish this I'm going to go with this is more like uharc

rogue_ger

1 points

3 months ago

I think we’re about to see a lot of attempts that went wrong.

Codyy2

1 points

3 months ago

Codyy2

1 points

3 months ago

Octodad!

jkblvins

1 points

3 months ago

He may be the only person to pay for it. Other than me.

Beanbakernot

1 points

3 months ago

He's a cat person.

onemanwolfpack21

1 points

3 months ago

Cool, hey, can you tell me where the gamestop is at in this mall?

EndDataMining

1 points

3 months ago

More like a .7z

buildabettermeme

1 points

3 months ago

Does this guy have EDS??

ALEXTS3AL

1 points

3 months ago

I love how he does all this and the hat stays on

Flimsy_Inevitable_15

1 points

3 months ago

That title is 10/10.

Enyk

1 points

3 months ago

Enyk

1 points

3 months ago

No wonder no one appeared to be paying him.

Havarian-boots

1 points

3 months ago

The mouse from Ladyhawk would be impressed

EvenBetterCool

1 points

3 months ago

It isn't black magic. We just watched it being exactly what it is. A flexible guy doing flexible stuff.

IshaanGupta18

1 points

3 months ago

WHAT THE FUCK , some actual good posts

reggiedoinreggie

1 points

3 months ago

This MF finna be reborn

DilutedGatorade

1 points

3 months ago

Get you a man who can fit through a tennis racket

rodrigo_c91

1 points

3 months ago

Women are wet!

nnmgRandomness

1 points

3 months ago

He should have just walked around 🤷

PilzGalaxie

1 points

3 months ago

For a few seconds at te beginning I thought He was gonna try and jump through ...

yp261

1 points

3 months ago

yp261

1 points

3 months ago

bones and all

captainvontage801

1 points

3 months ago

Didn't know Chris Webby stopped rapping

gunnnutty

1 points

3 months ago

Meanwhile me: gets his hand stuck in colandler handle first time i try ti pick it up

d_a_go

1 points

3 months ago

d_a_go

1 points

3 months ago

Police must hate him.

DaisyHotCakes

1 points

3 months ago

I wonder if a guy like this would have an edge on other cavers because he can squeeze through that tiny space so easily.

petwedge

1 points

3 months ago

And why?

Saraho94

1 points

3 months ago

I don't think I could fit one leg

[deleted]

1 points

3 months ago

Silly goofy hat.

Tito_Tito_1_

1 points

3 months ago

Was this from the Director's Cut of Constantine or something ?

The_Sloth_God

1 points

3 months ago

I know a firefighter when I see one.

AnvilBeatsRock

1 points

3 months ago

We have a grease man.

makka-pakka

1 points

3 months ago

Do it with the strings on and I'll be impressed

TonyTonyChopper

1 points

3 months ago

Just saw a video like this with a fireman going through a ladder section. Is this a trend now?!

ClashedProof

1 points

3 months ago

This is impressive but an instant small pp check

Relaxedtiger330

1 points

3 months ago

Homey ain’t got no nuts,what nuts Deez Nuts 🥜😆😆

sassafrasmon

1 points

3 months ago

He's really just an alien in a skin suit.

LeChatNoir04

1 points

3 months ago

Not even one if my thighs can pass through that racquet hoop, leave alone my whole body 💀

princess_poo

1 points

3 months ago

Idk why but this is really common in india. Often you see little kids performing with a little hoop on the side of the road for money. It’s really sad. But for that reason it seems like something that can be taught very very early on like gymnastics.

Dildont

1 points

3 months ago

zip it up and zip it out

Im_Dyslexic

1 points

3 months ago

I can't be the only one who noticed the racquet came off on only one leg? Something ain't right about that. It would have to pass through the dude's other leg to do that.

**Edit: Nevermind. Just noticed he put his other leg through first. I'm dumb.

Chaghatai

1 points

3 months ago

For someone flexible and lightly built, the hips are the only limitation

Space-90

1 points

3 months ago

This time will be free but next time you’re gonna have to pay

Olleye

1 points

3 months ago

Olleye

1 points

3 months ago

Heilige Scheiße.

GoLightLady

1 points

3 months ago

Unmuted it expecting something …

JohnBrownNeverSinned

1 points

3 months ago

The real blackmagicfuckery is hiding all the women.

IKROWNI

1 points

3 months ago

Chris webby killing it in everything he does.

Mugwump2323

1 points

3 months ago

“Winrar: It really woops the llama’s ass.”

DuckInTheFog

1 points

3 months ago

Glad he didn't catch his todger in his 7zip

LemmyLola

1 points

3 months ago

a guy I went to high school with could put himself through a wire coat hanger without bending it. RIP Kevin you were pretty cool

UglierThanMoe

1 points

3 months ago

Why doesn't the guy in the striped shirt just turn 90 degree so the other guy can walk past without having to squeeze through that racket?

Dhsu04

1 points

3 months ago

Dhsu04

1 points

3 months ago

My bear belly says no ... ain't fitting through that tiny loop

Luigi_Dangerous

1 points

3 months ago

I really thought he was gonna jump through head first

Cubby_Lumpkins

1 points

3 months ago

WHY 💀

Maikeru2007official

1 points

3 months ago

JOJO REFERENCE?!?! 😱⭕️‼️‼️

CoughtBySurprise

1 points

3 months ago

RARman, I guess...

MrAced

1 points

3 months ago

MrAced

1 points

3 months ago

r/prettynormalfu- WHAT'D HE JUST DO TO HIS ARM!?!?!?

BettySpaghetti_666

1 points

3 months ago

now i understand those stories of dudes escaping prison in unthinkable ways and unsolved crimes and anything mysterious. it was probably just some shi like this.

8675309eyen

1 points

3 months ago

This is a racket

DerBobbsen

1 points

3 months ago

In germany we call it asparagus....

Waste-Group-4490

1 points

3 months ago

Anorexic and double jointed...what's to see 🤣