bellabbr

I have 2 kids got divorced, when I was looking for someone to date I made sure they were childless. Hypocrite nah just knew my boundaries. I could barely handle my kids much less someone elses kid and baby mama drama, no thank you. Married a man who wasnt sure he wanted kids and knew my stance on no more kids for sure. after 3 yrs of living with mine he decided to get the V. Best step father ever. Its okay to know what you want and accept and your limitations.

Do not make life changing decisions when you are tired and having a newborn exhausts you. Get a paternity test done bc you will need it eventually but put everything on the backburner. Once you are sleeping 6 hrs a night consistently then you can reassess life.

Watch the movie The Son on netflix and you will get another validation that you did the right thing. Kids even more depressed teens are huge on privacy because they fee ashamed. It will pass continue on doing the right thing.

I got 14 and almost 17 yr old. My regret had ebbed and flowed. Sometimes it was barely there sometimes it was suffocating. As you raise kids you go through different phases, gain more confidence and gain diff perspective. Teen yrs are rough as fu%% and I am counting down the days until they move out ;)

Once my kids got older I : *Made more money. Sure that helped a lot. Even more to pay for sitters so I could do what I want. *divorced my useless ex and got a supportive amazing partner. Yep that helps a lot. He gives when I have nothing to give so I am not running on empty.

• but honestly the absolute best thing for my mental health and journey was truly giving up the marty status. Lowering my expectations to pretty much zero. I dont need to be perfect like the books taught me. Surviving sometimes is the big accomplishment. I am going to screw up, oh well they didnt come with manuals. You expect me to do anything without instructions, you are going to get my best shot. Deal with it. If you are not funding, fucking me or feeding me your opinion doesnt count. You can do better? Go for it pick them up on friday night for the weekend and show me. All the adults I know got mental health issues and working through shit in therapy, everyonr got a complaint about their childhood. So therefore my kid is more than likely going to end up in therapy as an adult ( heck they are in therapy now as teens) , so I am just giving them something to talk about ;) That is the key to this. Give up all expectations, wing it the best you can, hope for the best and survive. Its about all we can really do. That is the only thing that truly helps you feel better about this. Everyone is striving to be a good parent. Have you trully looked at what it takes to be a “good parent”? For me that is just keeping everyone alive , showing love and trying to raise them into decent members of society. I have kept everyone alive, show love, and wont know until they are decent members of society or not until adulthood, so that means I am a great parent right? You got to understand what success looks like, or you will end up feeling like a failure 100% of the time because you view of success is fluid.

I see the story of a survivor who is months away from accomplishing a really hard goal. Many people would have given up school because of the reasons but you didnt, you stuck through. When you are tired you rest you dont give up. You cant give up now, when you finish your degree, you will be able to get a better job, have more money, hire sitters, take care of yourself, more and do things that you enjoy. A new chapter is in the horizon. Just hang on through this chapter. Do get therapy because sounds a lot like ptsd and have your iron levels checked out. Mine was super low after having my kids, I would cry from pure exhaustion. After finding out I was anemic and got iron infusion, I felt like a brand new person. Hang in there you can do this.

Every-time she does this you drive her to the ER and say she is suicidal/homicidal and you want her to put her on a hold. They will admit her minimum 72hrs. But mostly they will evaluate her and put keep her for a week. From there you can get resources. Inpatient or Outpatient. Dont worry about insurance or anything. If the insurance wont pay , ypu got a ginormous bill that as long as you pay $10 a month, nothing they can do. And even after you can apply for programs that will wipe out that debt. But for now trip to the er you want her on hold to stop the problem right now. I did with mine she got held for 5 days 3 times and got a spot into IOP after the third time. Its a pain in the ass but I took her to the er, and told them help her because I cant. Only took 3 times before they listened because they knew I was going to keep coming back. Best option is a childrens hospital close to you. Good luck

Your problem is not your child its an abusive controlling husband. You need to focus on fixing that and getting out that situation. What do you think will happen in 6 months or a 1 yr if you dont take different actions? Nothing, you will be in the same situation. Focus on taking control of your life, like finances, schooling a job, getting a car, and stop letting him control it all. Took me yrs in therapy but I learned “ people only treat you how you allow them to treat you”. Stop allowing him to treat you like this. Good luck

My regret has ebbed and flow. With my oldest the first 3 yrs were brutal then 4-11 were awesome, 13-15 Omg I hate this. With my 2nd I loved 0-3, then again loved 4-10. 11-14 has been brutal. So yeah different phases brings different challenges that might make the regret grow. Also as we do it so much we learn tips and tricks to make it more bearable , gain confidence and its not constant misery anymore. Dont get me wrong, if I knew then what I know now, I would only have dogs and I am looking forward to empty nest, but dont absolutely daily hate my life anymore.

I have a spray bottle of vinegar in my shower : I rinse my hair with vinegar after shampoo and conditioner. Also I use vinegar for any cuts rashes or anything on my skin. And once a week or if I have a sore throat I swish and gargle vinegar.

Warning: does not thrive in cold temperatures. Beaches, sunshine and cold beer are necessary for longevity.

There is a big difference between letting a child cio to create a bed time routine and an emotionally unavailable parent. Dont compare the two. Letting your child cio for 3 days at night does not make you unattuned parent.

I know how rough it is, but look at it from a different perspective,you now have data. This weekend showed you how burned out you are and how much you needed a break because that break was a breath of air after drowning for so long. So tackle that. How can you get more breaks? I legitimately took on a 2nd part time job. Everyone thought I was insane. No working a couple hrs 3 days a week afforded me money to hire babysitters more often and go out with my husband. It was so worth it. So figure out a way to get more breaks. Heck maybe the grandparents are looking for more time with their grandkid and some cash. My ex mil was always broke And missing her grandkids. She took them off my hands for 2 weekends a month for a price. Now you know what the problem is, find a solution that can make things better.

Babies do not die from crying they die from stress out parents. Put her in her crib close the door and let her cry. At this point she should be able to sleep through the night without a problem. She will cry for a bit for 2 nights and will not cry the 3rd. Create a bedtime routine put her down and deal with it. I dont usually reccomend CIO, but when your mental health is this bad, you need a quick fix so you can tackle your mental health/ marriage. Because as soon as you put her down with routine by 7-8 pm , she sleeps, now you can focus on your husband and marriage, and know parenting duties ends at 7pm every-night is something to look forward to.

We got married in 2018, math tells me we have been married for 5 yrs, he says we been 6 yrs because we are on our 6th yr. No, we haven’t had a anniversary yet and I might murder you the day before our 6th anniversary. So yeah anytime someone asks we give 2 diff answers without missing a beat and bicker about it later.

braces for the all downvotes Long hair on men

A tongue will never miss the spot.

Aaliyah. She was in her prime gorgeous super talented singer and actress, and would have been huge probably as famous as Whitney, if not more, if she got a chance to continue.

Anyone who works in or with Compliance

Darling

If you ain’t got it together by now, no worries, none of us got it together, and none of us probably will.

Upgrade or The island. Both are amazing and everyone looks at me like I have 3 heads when I mention it

Red Jumpsuit Appraratus- facedown or Sublime- date rape

Because I always buy beer and it takes forever for someone to come and check my id

“You are so bad at everything, you can be good at anything “